Sunday, January 24, 2016

i <heart> nfl: championship weekend!

This time last year, deflated balls were on the lips of every sportscaster in the nation, and here we are a year later, with all those suspensions, lawsuits, and fines, and the NFL still is not taking care of its balls. Well I'll take anything to bring up widespread discussion of the Ideal Gas Law. For those punters among you, Barbara the Chicken has been accurately predicting playoff outcomes by pooping on the losing quarterback's face. On to the action!

I wonder if Peyton Manning sacking himself goes on his stat sheet

Sun 3:05pm CBS (PJ Leahy's, LIC, NYC, the 7 train work was cancelled due to Winter Storm Jonas, and this place is 10 feet from the V/Jax subway entrance... you can make it!): You are quite welcome, CBS, that you get to host Brady-Manning Bowl XVII, aka The Clash of the Taint-ans, likely the last time these storied competitors meet on the field of the battle. The Denver Broncos hate everything about the NE Pats, so look for the Denver defense to send a message to NE QB and whining crybaby Tom Brady, who throws a temper tantrum every time he takes a hit, much unlike his fellow teammates Bill Belichick and Chandler Jones. Perhaps the force would strike back if he played in a no flex zoneOtherwise you can expect Peyton Weeden to throw ducks all over the Pats defense.

6:40pm FOX: The Carolina Panthers need some really big rings and look to advance to the Super Bowl by playing it safe and using their sloppy home turf as an advantage against the Zony Cards. However, the Seattle Seahawks snitched and told the Cards about it, so the Panthers decided to freeze their turf, instead. The Zony Cards' QB Carson Palmer needs to keep his nerves and go short against a stout Panthers defense, whose fans will be growling for victory.

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