Sunday, January 20, 2019

i <heart> nfl: championship weekend!

Here we are, just as Rams CB Aqib Talib predicted, and both games are rematches from earlier in the season, and are also forecast to be close games!

Sun 3:05pm (FOX) Noted Millennial HC Sean McVay checks into the Hotel Katrina and aims to lead his LA Rams against the storied accomplishments by old Saints QB Drew Brees. Look for Rams CB Marcus Peters and Saints HC Sean Payton sharing a bowl of gumbo and various Saints players riding Choppa Style, which apparently is like riding a fake bicycle.

6:40pm (CBS): Unfortunately it looks like a polar vortex will miss Kansas City for the AFC Championship game, which is probably good for the Reidskins since Tom Brady is 'a fucking machine' in cold weather, although he does possess fewer playoff road wins than Mark Sanchez, the event of which can be squarely blamed on great TE and poor Safety Rob Gronkowski. The NE Pats, who no one believes in and no one wants to see in the Superbowl, feature a squadron led by creepy Lego Tom Brady whose coat keeps getting bigger against the classical clock mismanagement of KCHC Andy Reid. Reidskins fans will counter by drinking twice as much as they did last week.

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